year end

and so 2010 comes to an end.
i have no major gyan on endings and new beginnings. for me, this is simply another reason to celebrate. on a cool winter evening what could be better than getting together with family or friends, relaxing over a drink, chatting, laughing, and generally having a good time.
the interesting thing in this last week of the month is the need to be doing something on new year's eve. everything becomes important, your new year plans, who you are celebrating with, what you are wearing.... i don't know how that matters. what matters is whether you had a good time or not.
so here's hoping everyone has a good time celebrating the year end and welcoming the new year.

see you in 2011.

jiya lage na...

if i ever had to make a list of my top five hindi movie songs, this song from 'anand' would definitely have a place. lata mangeshkar is flawless, melodious, brilliant - and i am not even a lata fan. the lyrics are powerful. the music is charming and gentle, salil choudhary if i remember correctly.

ghalib

apparently ghalib was born around this time more than two hundred years ago. poetry buffs on the internet are all remembering him rather vocally. i have read and appreciated several of his works, even though i haven't necessarily understood every single word in every single piece. for me the fluidity of the language and the flow of the words are enough if the meaning is unclear. urdu poetry i think is meant to be read out by someone, rather than read by yourself - what an amazingly beautiful language and what justice ghalib does to it.

here are a couple of lines from one of my favourites - hazaaron khwaahishen aisi...

khudaa ke vaaste pardaa na kaabe se uthaa zaalim

kahiin aisaa na ho yahan bhii vahii kaafir sanam nikale

bahut nikale mere armaan magar phir bhi kam nikale...

2010

i am loathe to do a review of 2010 because it was largely a difficult year. though as difficult years go, 2008 and 2009 beat 2010 hands down.
2010 came dangerously close to 2009 at times, but eventually it just lacked the bite and venom and apathy that 2009 had. so if there were a 10 point scale with 10 being the BEST DAYS OF MY LIFE, 2010 would be a 4. which is actually saying a lot since 2008 and 2009 together scored about -2.
the other reason i am not doing a review is because i am lazy and i'd much rather look forward to 2011 than rehash 2010. there are no major learnings the year gave me.
unless you count 'no matter what you do, nothing will move unless it wants to' as a life lesson. or 'just ignore it and maybe it will sort itself out' as one.

but jokes apart, my belief in karma and goodness and all have just gotten stronger this year.
overall though, i have been a spectator this year more than anything else. and a rather confused one at that.

the art and the craft of writing

quotes from some of the world's best writers on their craft - some are wise, some plain funny and some deeply insightful. above all else, they are reassuring for anyone who attempts writing.

my picks are listed below, for the entire set of quotes, click here.

1. “All good books have one thing in common—they are truer than if they had really happened.” Ernest Hemingway
2. "A writer is congenitally unable to tell the truth and that is why we call what he writes fiction." William Faulkner
3. "One's religion is whatever one is most interested in." J M Barrie
4. “I have always imagined that paradise will be a kind of library.” Jorge Luis Borges
5. “Having your book turned into a movie is like seeing your oxen turned into bouillon cubes.” John le Carre
6. "I was working on the proof of one of my poems all the morning, and took out a comma. In the afternoon I put it back again." Oscar Wilde
7. "If I see an ending, I can work backward." Arthur Miller
8. "It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense." Mark Twain
9. "It's none of their business that you have to learn to write. Let them think you were born that way." Ernest Hemingway
10. "No passion in the world is equal to the passion to alter someone else's draft." H G Wells
11. “I have made this letter longer only because I have not had the time to make it shorter.” Blaise Pascal
12. "If I knew where poems came from, I'd go there." Michael Longley
13. "All things are difficult before they are easy." Thomas Fuller
14. “Were I to await perfection, my book would never be finished.” Chinese proverb
15. "Only bad writers think that their work is really good." Anne Enright
16. "Every time I peer into [my 13-volume Oxford English Dictionary], which is several times a day, I think: All the words I'll ever need are here; the only thing I have to do is get them in the right order." Andrew Motion
17. "The first draft of anything is shit." Ernest Hemingway
18. “Every writer I know has trouble writing." Joseph Heller
19. “The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.” Mark Twain
20. “It is impossible to discourage the real writers—they don't give a damn what you say, they're going to write.” Sinclair Lewis

:)

i am in a good mood. of course the fact that it is friday makes the mood better. plus i had a good evening with friends and colleagues last evening. and i have finally picked up ken follett's latest. i am just about 44 pages into it and cannot wait to read what happens next. today is also the day i get daughter's weekly email. also it just so happens that 24 december has some very good memories for me.
as they said in that lovely song, 'har ek cheez hai apni jagah thikane pe, kai dinon se shikayat nahi zamane se'.
contentment = happiness.

long day

woke up at five a.m. today. j is on a work trip just for the day. i am already at work but today is secret santa afternoon at work and i have no gift for the person for whom i am to be santa. damn, i don't even know what to get really. as for me, if i get another crappy gift this year, i am going to whack my santa on the head with it. just saying.
after which, there's a drinks and dinner thingie where a bunch of us are taking a friend out. i was really looking forward to it, but it's 10 a.m. now and i am already sleepy. god knows how long i will last.....
why do other people's blogs sound so eventful? i think either my life is bloody boring or my writing is. either ways, that's reason enough for me to feel worse.

not asking for much...

a dear friend reminded me of this song and introduced me to this version.... enjoy it!




[UPDATE / MAR 2011]
ok, the video has since disappeared. you can still find it on youtube though - go here.

full of feeling

feeling pain, that is.
and i have not even worked out today. this is all thanks to yesterday - my body takes its revenge cold-bloodedly, ruthlessly.
"make us work will you? think again.." my muscles said, laughing evilly.
every abdominal muscle hurts, hamstrings hurt, my sides hurt.

and the saddest and most terrifying part is that this is just the beginning.

eyes. must keep eyes open.

have woken up way too early for two days in a row. walked for an hour yesterday. today, worked out to a fitness dvd for the first time EVER in my life. and i have promised myself i will walk again today evening. my eyelids appear to have just one mission in life - to drop and stay shut.
i was actually *this* close to dozing off during a chat with a candidate today. i am a truly good person at heart, and thinking of what the candidate would feel if i fell asleep was just about the only thing keeping me awake. i thought updating ze blog might wake me up.

and now there's a con call..... and straining to hear everyone, not to mention trying to understand the various accents should wake me up fully!!

men, women and friends

"a woman may very well form a friendship with a man, but for this to endure, it must be assisted by a little physical antipathy." - friedrich nietzsche

"between men and women there is no friendship possible. there is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship." - oscar wilde

"ek ladka aur ek ladki kabhi dost nahi ho sakte." - sooraj barjatiya

hyacinth

poetry is hyacinths for my soul. if you know what i mean.
http://www.urdupoetry.com/ghalib28.html

image borrowed from flowersformums.co.uk.

he of the eyebrows, she of the long legs

i saw 'break ke baad'.
interesting to watch how we have evolved. now apparently it's the girl who is drinking and smoking and commitment-phobic and following her heart / dreams / fancies while the boy is docile and sweet and understanding.

yeah i think we could maybe live with that. though i don't know why even one of the two has to be like that....

the morning after

had a good weekend. was out saturday afternoon, saturday night and then again sunday evening.



saturday evening was tremendous fun, catching up with old colleagues. i couldn't remember when i had last laughed so much. then went on to another do with lord & master and his friends, winding up around 4:30 am.



yesterday evening was learning and exchanging ideas. it woke me up a little intellectually. there is a buzz to learning and sharing knowledge that you won't know unless you have tried it seriously.



and apart from all the fun, i discovered something : a little eye make up can do a lot.

will you be my frand?

this is an awesome real message i received on facebook from someone who wants to be my friend.

==============================================================================

Hi Gud afternoon with smile,
You really hve very decnt , sensible, mature & very decent way of presences
your self with have lots of mind, thoughts which truely shows hw mature are you are, its really vry impressive n shows how intelligent lady you are..
M quite impress with ur profile n M really felt to drop few words of me.
Well about my self :-
TO, be frank m looking for mature, healthy, senable with good communications of friendship, friendship which start with lots purity, smile, care & ture feeling for eachothers in words.. .
For me friendship is words of trst, smile & care & trure support for friend
For me friendship also meant to share & b with smallest happiness or biggest hassles in life were am can truly support you , stand bside you, & can really give true support in those precious movement wr u really need ture support of life from friendship. like one feel to her backbone to life.
Friendship is not meant to say hi, hello or to shar kup of Koffe or Tea, but a smile whn u meet, C or hear voice of ur friend hw ever u r in tens or in bad shape of life....
For me physical looks, appearance, age of those temporary beauty , d`nt matter or have any value in life

Am strongly believe in mental beauty & strong relationship.
One thing m can assure u waana fell guilty day u interact or wsh to me..
If you think I can be best of your friend

now? you are kidding me right?

for months, nothing happens.
you wait, you try, you watch and wait some more. then things get better. and then everything starts happening together.
sooner or later i'll have to make a decision. of the kind i don't like.

i had planned some changes in 2011 and it looks like i should be prepared for more.

maternal mush

have had a rather weepy couple of days.

daughter's gone back to school on sunday and every time i see something of hers lying around at home, the tears well up and i remember how much i miss her. so far, one stuffed pink poodle, a watercolour painting about 3" x 4", my own dog wagging her tail, a letter, a ratty old tee shirt, her bicycle, a framed photograph by my bedside have all triggered the waterworks.

today i have not cried at all. this is good. i hope she's coping much better.

movies

movies? what's that? i haven't seen any in so long, i ought to rescind my self proclaimed title of 'movie buff'.
'deathly hallows' has been out for three days and i am nowhere close to even planning to see it. 'action replayy' has come and gone. so has 'robot' ages ago. now there's 'guzaarish' which i want to see in spite of severe misgivings. i think [and i am embarrassed to confess] 'dabangg' was the last movie i watched in a movie theatre. sacrilege, heresy, blasphemy.
though on another note, i caught about 8 - 10 minutes of some ghastly fakeness on 'big boss'; i couldn't possibly have watched more.

shopping and packing on the cards, as daughter gets ready to head back to school.

hurrah

hurrah it's the weekend. and then i'm taking time off next week. this is as good as it gets =)

quote of the day

"sometimes we always use the internet."
actually said today by someone explaining a process to someone else.

yeh meri life hai

some phone calls. many emails. an interview or two. some time on the internet [aka my only addiction or 'moa' ]. the daily mail crossword in the economic times. striking things off the things to do list. some pressures. perhaps a meeting or two. some handholding. more time on the internet.
yeh hai meri kahani.

genesis

yet another foray into blogging. this is officially the sixth.